It is 7:57 am and my make-up has already been cried away.
Over the past few days I have had three people on different occasions
ask when my husband and I were going to start having children. Little did they
know the answer they were going to receive. I am sure they asked the question
out of genuineness and were only trying to make conversation.
But I struggled with how to answer this question? Should I be
honest and say, “actually we have already started and we now have an angel
baby.” Do I say, “We are working on it.” Or, my gut response “Mind your own f’ing
business, when did my sex life become an appropriate topic of your
conversation?” Do I simply shrug it off and do a polite laugh with no answer?
I realized that I have to be honest. I owe it to Joey. So, I
responded with, “we had a baby but he is already an angel,” and then my eyes
welled with tears. I am certain they were not expecting this, but they asked
so I answered.
I am sure I have asked this question in the past. Now, I
realize how insensitive it is.
Do me a favor; please do not ask people when they are going
to start having children. You don’t know their story. Such a simple question
could send a person into tears for the rest of the day.
If you have to ask the
question, you are not close enough to the person to need to know the answer.
This makes my heart hurt for you! Even if they didn't mean to, I can't imagine having to answer that question. But, I'm glad you answered honestly. Sharing your story will keep Joey's memory alive for others, and it perhaps it will help others that have dealt with the same tragic situation deal with their loss as well. You're so strong, and I'm thinking about you! :)
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